The film is now 95% shot with one final scene to go, a live performance of JACK AND THE BEANSTALK, a 15-minute clown duet I will shoot two versions of -- one with audience and one without. Though I have sent out invitations to those who might know of parents with children ages 3-7 to attend our free show, I have no idea who will come or how many or how few. I have been seriously out of the Parents With Children loop for the last fifteen years.
Since almost none of my current friends have young kids, I'm half-expecting tofilm this performance to an empty house -- the other half of me isexpecting a miracle. I am also prepared to film whatever happens as an honest expression of the story at hand: two guys apprenticing to anoccult magickian who assigned them the advancement ritual of going into business as clowns. This very premise is hilarious to me but also, a little sad and a tad perverse.
I am officially spent and reduced. One big reason I make these underground feature films is to fully exhaust my resources where I can discover the outer limits of my talents, skills, and knowledge. I live for this experience of total offering of self, the deep emptyness that follows, and the new perspective born from their uniquely exhilarating processes. This offering of self has also manifested literally and physically -- since starting this project last May I have dropped twenty-five pounds. I have just enough energy left to show up the day after tomorrow and film some clowns performing a fable about giants, castles, a goose, golden eggs, mothers, cows, a cupcake goddess, and strangers in marketplaces.
Over the next four months the plan is to review all twenty hours of footage, create a rough cut of the film and then, finesse this rough-cut online using nonlinear editing towards a final cut version (onFinal Cut Pro). My fantasy is to have the film, "To Dream of FallingUpwards", ready for its world premiere here in the SF Bay area on2/11/2011 and then, to tour it along the pacific coast arthouse circuit in May/June. Before all of this, however, I plan to fall asleep on the beach for a few days and nights to the sounds of waves lapping and crashing through me.
"To Dream of Falling Upwards"