Sunday, April 18, 2010

Part 4 - April 19, 2010 (final LAB entry)

The Muses Lab itself is over and now the echoes begin -- the waves of influences absorbed over the last twenty sessions now settle and rise, descend and ascend, throughout my daily course of living. I find myself tending to a new inner action, a movement similar in feeling to the tiny convulsions of seedlings breaking ground as they reach for sunlight. This feeling informs my daily decisions about what to do, where to go, who to meet, and also around what, who, and where to avoid contact. Certain elements of the new film script story incubating in me for the last year or so have begun to converge, bringing new complexity and texture to previously segregated ideas. I also find myself reaching out more to situations and people that might inspire me, regardless of previous preconceptions, beliefs, and standards.

The bardo tunnel realm enveloping me for the last two years is gone. What's before me feels open and lit up yet requiring the second attention to navigate the phenomena (first attention linked to language and the machine of thinking; second attention linked to presence, energy, phenomena). All the trinity source work -- our groundwork in the Muses Lab -- has formed a kind of internal foundation from which I am discovering new contexts to view my daily experiences and the artistic direction of this next film project. I am feeling ready to start scripting the story within the next few days, which is to say, I also don't feel ready but am willing to start the effort of articulating what has been gestating in me. Fortunately, this assumption about needing to be totally prepared before initiating a creative process was long ago exposed as just another excuse, a sorry-ass justification to procrastinate. Excuses! Excuses are for wimps.


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